And this is how it goes...

Interesting photographs. Don't care for the lighting in a few. Others, I'm surprised at the quality.

Slightly unrelated or not, an acquaintance of mine decided to quote from a movie recently:

"My love said she would marry only me
And Jove himself could not make her care,
For what women say to lovers, you'll agree,
one writes on running water or on air"

And soon followed it with: "Poetry don't work on whores."

I would think any woman who thought about those lines would not care for them. The "whore" part is just extraneous.

( Private to Reeve )

How is that painting going, darling angel?

( Private to Peter )

( Private to Sam )

Sometimes, the scenarios I run through for work bring back times before. Right now a Broadway song is humming through my head, and apparently Fred likes it: A Secretary is not a Toy.

I cried myself to sleep last night after watching the last episode of Angel. Fred is lonely, and I am tired. This is absolutely ridiculous.

I haven't had sushi like that in a while; yesterday's outing was rather refreshing. Thank you.

( Private to Rebecca )

I believe I'd like to throw a party. A small gathering. Intimate.

Now, whomever should I invite?

Devil or angel. Dear, which ever shall I be?

The economy hasn't hurt business; I find that interesting.

( [Private to Zen] )

( [Private to Rebecca] )

Business is booming, even with the slumped economy.

Yet, I cannot bring myself to be happy. Before anyone connects this moment of unhappiness to my current profession, please, spare me. I rather enjoy my job; remember, it is a service profession, so it can't be that bad.

No. Something is nagging at me, and it's not Fred.

This is why I hate going into public sometimes. I swear some kid sneezed on me, and now I feel..not myself.

( [Private to Kent] )

To all those who knew, know, wish to know Fred:

She hasn't left the building, but she is definitely no longer in control. She has left two names with me as far as what she called "Agency types, who have all sorts of answers": Casey Beckett or Thomas Doyle. I want answers; do be good and give me some. The biggest question would be "why the hell do I have charges based in England and Japan?" Yes, I know how, but why was this sort of thing allowed?

Zen and Travis: I suggest you find some other playmate.

Caldwell: I want my files.

Micah: We need to speak, now.

Parker: For what it's worth, the silly fool says she's sorry to a point.

Dwelling on the bad things isn't good for me, and they aren't good for Elsa. Plus, they lead to Cave-Fred, and I'm not going to be Cave-Fred. Don't get me wrong; still got bad things going on in my head, but I'm just not going to let them stop me for long. Not sure I'm going to go back to London anytime soon, but it was a nice city, what I saw of it. Still thinking about going to Japan, but right now, I have to figure out what to do about my car.

I decided that I was going to drown my sorrows in pancakes; I know not my body to ruin with pancakes, but I really did need to get something like pancakes or waffles, something with syrup. That or tacos. It didn't matter because my car wouldn't start. It tried figuring out what was wrong, but I'm just not seeing it. Think it's probably something electrical, and Elsa doesn't have what I need to fix it. Or I think I could fix it; I'm pretty sure I could fix it. So long story short - I know "too late" - anyone in LA know a decent mechanic in LA?

There's swelling, but Kent, that's Dr. Caldwell. He's really nice. He made sure there was a way to get the swelling down with a drug regiment that didn't require me going into the hospital. So, don't know how long it's going to take, but she should be back. Have to say, I'm a little nervous about it. What if she doesn't like me? What if I have problems like some people? What if she makes me do her job? I don't think I could do it. Well, actually she'd be doing it, and if she had full control of her body, I probably wouldn't be able to say a single word about it, which would be sort of bad. I mean I could probably say something in her head, and drive her crazy, but I don't want to drive her crazy.

I found some letters today, too. And a second laptop. Actually it's a third laptop. The girl's got a laptop for everything. The letters were from a Mark and Betsy Allen in Idaho. I don't know what's going on, but I feel like I'm some weird Nancy Drew movie. Is there a Jessica Fletcher out there? Or maybe a Columbo?

So, yeah, my..her..the brain in this body will be okay eventually. I picked up the medication, and while it might make me a little loopy, as if you could tell the difference, I think everything will be okay. And no food allergies! And, everything came back clean bill of health! Except for the swelling that's keeping her MIA, of course.

Well, good news. I'm not dying anymore than I was to begin with, so that's good news.

Bad news: need to wait on test results to find out treatments for what's going on in my head. Or her head. Elsa's head. Cause it's really not my head, it is but it isn't.

No matter what, not going to stay in the hospital if I don't have to. Also have to figure out a different way to make money.

Anyone need a lab assistant, a researcher, a physicist? R&D?

Okay. I found a computer. Jameson comma Elsa has a computer. I guess that sorta makes sense, she's got everything else here. It's a little frightening all the things she's got. I'm not gonna list 'em cause I don't want y'all to think anything you shouldn't about her. Cause I don't even know what it is she does. I think it'd be nice if I did, but I don't. I could probably guess, but right now I don't think what I think is all that nice. Not that I think anything bad, but it could be very bad if what I think is true. Ever had one of those thoughts?

So, I found a computer. I tried doing a search on Jameson comma Elsa, but-oh, her names not Jameson comma Elsa, that'd be a weird name, wouldn't it? No, no, her names Elsa Jameson. Gotta try and keep from saying the comma. The comma only goes in if the name's backwards, and most people would know that, if they're English speaking because if they were Chinese and I think Japanese the name would be the other way around, so it really wouldn't be backwards, but I don't think there'd be a comma, so that sorta takes care of that.

As I was saying, I found a computer and tried looking up something on Elsa Jameson. Got nothing. Not even a picture. I know what she looks like; all I gotta do is look in the mirror for that, but I thought what with everyone connected these days. Guess she's not all connected, even if her phone never stops ringing. I'll have to try to break into her email later; I tried earlier - I'm still a little discombobulated. It's one thing to be whisked away to another dimension full of people/demons who wanna eat you; it's another to be whisked away after you know you're pretty much dead to sit in a body of someone you don't know at all.

Oh, yeah, I'm Fred. How's everyone doing?

( I just don't understand. Who's really driving this thing? )